Message from John Carter

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Sunday, April 17, 2011

Why Don't We Wrestle More Often?

Don't ask me what the illustration has to do with the topic.  Nothing really.  I just like the drawing.  It's so odd, isn't it?  Sort of a mash-up of Aztec/Mayan and Japanese eroticism.  I have no idea who the artist is--maybe one of you guys know?  I found this on the man2manalliance website, a site devoted to the idea that homosexual sex should be limited to frot. 

Anyway, why don't we--the members of the gay wrestling community-wrestle more often?  What are the factors that keep us apart?  Distance, certainly.  We tend to live all over the United States and the World, but it's more than that.  I am always surprised to learn that even in large metropolitan areas where there are plenty of wrestlers on global fights, they rarely get together and wrestle.  Why-the-heck is that?

I think one reason is that many people who post online about wanting to wrestle find it difficult to follow-through with an actual wrestling match.  The fantasy of it is difficult to translate into the reality.  After-all, to actually wrestle someone does require a certain amount of courage and trust.  The effort we expend in time and travel - and in money (hotels, etc.) make it a tough sell to some people, even when an opponent lives in the same city. 

Another issue is that when we see a posting online, we assume that the person is just sitting there, waiting to wrestle.  Many times this is not the case.  The lag between when a posting is made and when that person is contacted may include family problems, issues at work, etc. When we contact a potential wrestling partner, that person may be in the middle of the worse days of their life.  We have no way of knowing.

Another possible aspect is the inherent promiscuity of male homosexuals.  It seems to me that many men want to wrestle, once, and then never want to see that person again.  There is some part of our make-up which drives us on and on, looking for the right person, the best possible match.  All the while we let possible friends and wrestling partners fall by the way side because once we've wrestled they no long fit into our ready-built fantasy world. 

I propose that we begin to change our views on these things.  We need to work together to bring in more guys in a safe, fun environment.  We need to follow-up on emails and calls.  Stay in touch with former wrestling partners (I try to), and reach out to new ones.  We need to attend events like Hillside and the Clash and try and bring in new guys each year.  In short, we need to build our community, not let our inherent weaknesses drive us apart. 

Anyone have any ideas on this subject?  I'd love to hear them. 

1 comment:

  1. John Carter, would u like to wrestle? I'm 5'8", 150, athletic Puerto Rican. U up for a serious contest?