Wednesday, May 18, 2011
It's Time For a Wrestling Road Trip (continued)
When you are planning on meeting a guy for the first time, it's important to at least attempt to define the limits and the type of match that you will engage in. The trouble with this is that you are usually limited to text messages and emails - both of which can be misleading. Take for instance the word "sex."
If you indicate that you want to wrestle and have sex - that may mean a lot of different things. Do you want to have anal sex? Oral? Just mutual JO? Frottage? Or does your prospective opponent not want any form of sex? You need to be a little explicit about expressing your desires and limits. I, for one, do not engage in anal sex with guys I've just met. Condom or no condom. Oral is pretty much out too. It's too dangerous unless I know the guy. But, a lot of guys out there want to wrestle for top - to see who will take the top position - or want to force you to suck them off. It's part of their fantasy. All that needs to be decided by mutual consent. Not by force.
The point I'm trying to make is that you are going to meet a guy that you've contacted off the internet - sight-pretty-much-unseen - so you need to feel that person out a bit about what they want to get from the encounter. I mean, you want both parties to have a good time (not just you) but within acceptable limits. Read profiles carefully for hints about a person's interests. If they mention bondage and S&M, that probably means that they find bondage and S&M a turn on. The question is then: do you? If so, great. But if not, then you need to make that plain.
I don't, however, want to make too much of all this. In my experience, I've only had troubles with this sort of thing once or twice - and both times a discussion cleared things up. Most of the guys who compose the wrestling fraternity are really cool and open-minded. Speak up. Make your desires clear. But listen to their desires, too. It's not all about you. It really does take two to tango.