Message from John Carter

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Saturday, May 21, 2011

It's Time For a Wrestling Road Trip (continued)

Okay, it's a Saturday afternoon and I'm sitting in front of my PC writing.  I should be wrestling!  I tried to find someone to wrestle with this weekend.  I wrote to several guys on globalfights and even talked with a friend who is not really a big wrestler - no takers.  Everyone had things they had to do.  I'm sort of bummed.  I was hoping to slip on some loose-fitting shorts and some flip-flops and show up at someone's house with no shirt and a big-time attitude.  Ready to strip down and wrestle.  But...no.

Anyway, no time for feeling sorry for myself.  Instead, I'll think about my up-coming wrestling road trip. 

Now, I'll be the first to admit that I am not always the most aggressive guy.  In fact, I am normally pretty easy-going.  I was never the sort of guy who just walked up to another guy and shoved him.  I feel a little fake talking like some macho hound. Still in wrestling, I have got to be more aggressive.  I suppose that is one of the issues many gay men encounter in wrestling - the desire to be aggressive vs. the urge to be gentle.  I find that in some matches I can be overly passive in my wrestling.  I can't quite explain why.  I'm not sure I understand why.

It might have something to do with the perceived physical superiority of my opponent.  They say that in college wrestling, the first take-down is often times what makes the match.  And in wrestling a guy, the first few moves can put a mental stamp on a match that can make it either a lot of fun or a big drag.  For me, I like that feeling that I can hold my own.  I want to feel that I won't just be put on my back and held there.  I want to at least be able to keep the action going and apply holds as well as have them applied to me.

There are guys I've wrestled who I've discovered in the first few seconds of my match were out of my league.  Stronger.  Faster.  Better skilled.  Some of those guys have gone on to just dominate me.  They never allowed me to escape a hold or apply one to them.  They were too busy beating me.  Those are the type of matches I prefer to avoid.  I want more give-and-take.  I don't want to be pinned and held there. 

This is sort of a perennial problem for me.  Being a smaller guy who often winds up wrestling guys with 20, 30, 40 or more pounds on me, I often wind up being pummeled.  My last trip allowed me to wrestle a few guys who were more my size and I had a blast.  This up-coming trip I haven't done quite as well at finding guys my own size.  So, we'll see how it goes.  I'll have to really work myself up into a competitive frenzy.   Part of my problem is mental.  I need to over-come the idea that I can be beaten.  Right? 

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